- Recently, in a large French city, a poster featuring a young, thin and tan woman appeared in the window of a gym. It said:
- THIS SUMMER DO YOU WANT TO BE A MERMAID OR A WHALE?
- A middle aged woman, whose physical characteristics did not match those of the woman on the poster, responded publicly to the question posed by the gym.
- To Whom It May Concern:
- Whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, sea lions, curious humans). They have an active sex life, they get pregnant and have adorable baby whales. They have a wonderful time with dolphins stuffing themselves with shrimp. They play and swim in the seas, seeing wonderful places like Patagonia, the Bering Sea and the coral reefs of Polynesia. Whales are wonderful singers and have even recorded CDs. They are incredible creatures and virtually have no predators other than humans.
- They are loved, protected and admired by almost everyone in the world.
- Mermaids don't exist. If they did exist, they would be lining up outside the offices of Argentinean psychoanalysts due to identity crisis. Fish or human? They don't have a sex life because they kill men who get close to them not to mention how could they have sex? Therefore they don't have kids either.
- Not to mention who wants to get close to a girl who's skin is all scaly and smells like a fish store?
- The choice is perfectly clear to me...
- I want to be a whale.
- P.S. We are in an age when media puts into our heads the idea that only skinny people are beautiful, but I prefer to enjoy an ice cream with my kids, a good dinner with a man who makes me shiver and a latte with my friends. With time, we gain weight because we accumulate so much information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more room, it distributes out to the rest of our bodies. So we aren't heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated and happy. Beginning today, when I look at my butt in the mirror I will think, "Good gosh, look how smart I am"!
Showing posts with label Diet. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Diet. Show all posts
Tuesday, 10 November 2009
I am most definitely SMART!
Friday, 12 June 2009
Boring Boring Boring.....
OK, please see post below from Monday 12th January!! I might as well just cut and paste it - how annoying is that! 6 months on and I can say exactly the same thing all over again. So, basically I have done CRAP over the last 6 months....yes.....6 freakin months and now I'm saying the same old boring thing again about the same old boring diet. Day 1 (again) and yes I have managed to stay within my points! I am hoping that one day when I say this same old boring stuff that I will actually have the will power to STICK to it and that in 6 months time I am SLIM!!!! Other people do it so why the hell can't I just get my arse into gear and DO IT too!!!!!!!!!!!!! ok, rant over LOL xx
Monday, 12 January 2009
Diet (yes again) Day 1
OK, I'm back, been a looooooooooooong time gone but I'm back now :o)
Joined Weight Watchers today and so far so good. I get 23 points and I have had 20 today - woooo hoooo.
Off to bed now, hopefully tomorrow will be a good day too. One day at a time this time and slowly slowly catchy monkey or so they say!!
Saturday, 12 July 2008
Change Of Diet
So, I have lost over 17 pounds now! I actually stopped doing the lighter life diet last week and have just been eating really carefully since then and lost another couple of pounds on my own! I am still on my mission to get to 140 pounds but it just might take a little longer now but that is cool with me :o)
Wednesday, 25 June 2008
Pounds AND inches.....going going going!!
Another 3.6 pounds gone so that is a total of 15.2 pounds all together which is over a stone! That's in just 3 weeks! Feels like about 3 years though I have to say! (a stone is 14 pounds for you USA bods that don't know). So that is my first stone GONE!! So, if I can do that well and I have not been perfect on it, just think what I could do if I stuck to the rules 100% and WAS perfect! So, that's what I'm gonna try to do this week!!
Oh, and inches!! We got measured again this week and I have lost a whopping 6 1/2 inches off my waist. Another 2 1/2 off my bust and also 2 off my hips!! Excellent !!!!!!!!
I also got my self respect back and sorted out my love life! I am officially young free and PROPERLY single. Got rid of half hearted substitutions and feel so much better now :o) I was hanging on to ifs buts and maybes and felt like my life was on hold waiting for someone else to make their mind up! No longer!! I made MY mind up instead!! I know it is gonna be a bit of a tough road now and then but right now I'M COOL and feel POSITIVE :o)
Wednesday, 18 June 2008
A Little Bit More Gone
Another 2.8 pounds has vacated my body!!!!!!!! Wooooo Hooooo!! Considering I had a very difficult week and cheated a little I am very pleased. I tell you what, it is HARD not EATING! Anyway, this week is going to be a good week. I decided to try the Thai chilli soup instead of having vanilla milkshake EVERY day 4 times a day! It was actually quite nice, not bad. I better go now as I have physio on my back. I just dropped Kadyn off at Nursery for the first time!
Friday, 13 June 2008
No More 13!!!
I am no longer 13 stone something, I am now 12 stone something!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am NEVER going to be 13 stone something EVER again!!!! I am not going to update my weight ticker wotsit until my official weigh in next week but I think I have lost another pound according to MY scales!! Love It!!!! I was feeling a bit deflated with the whole thing the other day and then I watched a programme on the TV about big babies. Babies that were born to obese women and the babies were a whole stone when they were born! One was 15 pounds!!! Poor baba's!! Then the mums were feeding them whole bags of chips and junk food. One baby was having a pint of milk every 2 hours!!! The mums seemed to think it was funny but I just felt awful! Those poor little baba's don't stand a chance! Anyway, it set me right back into the right frame of mind - I'm on a roll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Woooo Hoooo!
Wednesday, 11 June 2008
Only 13 More!
One week down only 13 more weeks to go. I have decided to narrow it down a bit more so it doesn't seem like quite such a hurdle. Just taking 1 month at a time! I MISS food, not cos I'm hungry as I'm not at all but just cos I miss food. I MISS eating! Anyway, I had 2 tiny hiccups but instead of it completely cocking up the diet or turning them into major hiccups, I drew a line under them and moved on and I have lost a whopping total of 8.8 pounds in ONE week!!! I am drinking about 3 litres of water but will try this week to get that up to 4 litres.
When you get to class each week you have to fill in a sheet to say which milkshakes,soups or bars you want for the following week. There is banana,chocolate,caramel,raspberry,strawberry and vanilla milkshake. Chicken,mushroom or Thai soup and about 3 different bars. The bars taste the same as far as I'm concerned and just taste like chewy powder yukiness. The chicken soup isn't that bad, just tastes like normal cupasoup which I'm also not a huge fan of. You have to have 4 things a day so 28 in total. Most people's lists are very varied with different flavoured shakes and soups and a bar each day (you can only have 1 bar a day). My list was easy! 22 vanilla shakes and 6 choc ones please! (and even then I only ordered chocolate ones cos I didn't want everyone to think I was a total loon!) I am definitely an all or nothing person. That is my personality all over. Do something obsessively for a week or 2 until I can't stand it anymore. Then stay off it for a while then all of a sudden back on it obsessively. Why can't I just do a little of everything??? LOL Anyway, I'm waffling again!
So, I'm 8.8 pounds lighter than I was last week - Wooooooooo Hoooooooooo! I actually feel much better too, not as tired all the time.
Better go as Loola has got the hang of crawling more than 3 steps forwards now and is on her way into the kitchen!!!
Sunday, 8 June 2008
One Step, Two Steps....
I did some exercise! I went over to mums and we went to dinton pastures which has some lovely lakes that you can walk round. It was really sunny and there were lots of people out having picnics and stuff. We walked round the whole BIG lake which is about 3 miles I think! Mum has a bad back too but it is something different to mine and she finds it easier to walk slower where I find it better if I really strut and go quite fast so that is a bit difficult. I sometimes strut off ahead of her and then strut back to her as we go around. Anyway - I am proud that I got off my fat bum and did some EXERCISE! Yay Hay!!!!!!
Daddy just called to say he is on his way. He was meant to have Kadyn back by 6 but he is never on time! Looking forward to seeing her :o)
Day 5 Of Lighter Life
Well, amazingly, I'm NOT hungry! No FOOD for the last 4 days! You would think on 530 calories a day I would be STARVING but I'm not. The milkshakes add up to 530 cals by the way just in case I started to confuse you. Your body goes into ketosis which means it uses the energy in the FAT you have stored in your body and believe me I have enough of it so I'm feeling COOL! I didn't drink as much as I should have yesterday so today I am on a mission to do better with the water AND do some exercise!!!!! My back feels much better this morning so gonna finish my cleaning now and then jump in the shower and head on over to my mums. Daddy will bring Kadyn home tonight so I have the day to myself and I'm sure she is having lots of fun with her Daddy.
Water, Water, Water............................................
Saturday, 7 June 2008
A Bit Of This & A Bit Of That!
OK, so I haven't been around for a while. I've had so much going on and just haven't been in the "blogging zone". I think I just blogged myself out! Also, I'm not lucky enough to blog totally honestly about what is going on in my life as I have readers that would be hurt or offended or affected by what I wrote about so I don't write about it but I wish I could if that makes sense???
Anyway, I've had a tough few weeks but I'm sorting myself out! My diet went totally to pot and I ended up putting weight on, getting all upset about it and deleting my diet blog. I just don't have the time to do as much as I want with the 2 blogs I already have and cos it wasn't going well it just seemed like a mission and a chore rather than something I enjoyed.
I am finally in the zone now and last Tuesday I started the Lighter Life Diet! It is a bit extreme I know but I AM GOING TO DO IT! I have a friend who did it and went from a size 18 to size 10 in 14 weeks! In the 14 week foundation plan you lose on average 3 stone! BUT......you are not aloud to eat ANY FOOD! You have 4 milkshakes a day which give you all the protein, vitamins & minerals that you need to stay healthy and they are yummy which is a bonus! You have a 2 hour counselling session a week which is the bit I really wanted. I have yo yo dieted for years and I need to work out why I have such a crap relationship with food! You have to get the ok from your doctor and they see you monthly too. Anyway, I have been doing it for 4 days so far and I have already lost 7 pounds! Flipping Fantastic!!!!!!!!!!! You have to drink 4 litres of water a day which I am struggling to do as I usually go days without drinking ANYTHING (bad I know) but I am just about managing just over 3 litres and I'm trying to get it up a bit each day.
I have to keep telling myself it is JUST for 3 months, 14 measly weeks and I will have lost all this flabber labber and be slim again. After the 14 weeks they start to introduce food slowly back into your diet. That way you get to know what foods are good for you individually and what foods are trigger foods. Trigger foods are ones that make you more hungry and want to overeat etc. Everyone has different trigger foods. The way they see it is that if you have a problem with alcohol or drugs they remove them TOTALLY from your system so that's what they are doing with the food as FOOD is my DRUG and right now it is making me ill. It is making me fat and miserable and I wanna fix it! I had actually asked my doctor for counselling but was told that because I don't make myself throw up it is not officially classed as an eating disorder. How stupid is that??????! So, I stuff my face and don't throw up which is making me FAT - surely that is still a problem? Anyway, obviously not in the official medical terms! SO, that's why I started Lighter Life, mainly for the counselling as I want to get to the bottom of WHY I binge eat especially when I know it makes me so miserable.
Blimey, can't believe I just said all that out loud!
Kadyn (aka Little Loola) has been much much more active and wanting far more attention, another reason why I have not been blogging as much as I need to entertain her way more than I used to. She has started crawling now and I have been slightly, only slightly mind you, better at keeping her blog updated. Daddy just came to pick her up as she is spending the weekend with him. I am quite relieved as my back is really sore today and I find it really difficult to pick her up and stuff which is very frustrating for both of us.
I am going to TRY to tidy up my house now as it is so much easier without Kadyn around. She gets all upset if I go in a different room to her and if I take her in the room and try to hoover she screams the place down. I don't know why she hates the hoover so much!
After that I'm gonna go over to my Mum's and do the Naming Ceremony invitations or at least try to and possible clean my car. Although I'm tempted to get some little dude to do it at one of the drive in ones - hmmm, that sounds like a much better idea.
Right, finally a BIG SORRY to all the blogging buddies that I have not been over to see lately like Pam and Melanie. I will try to catch up as soon as poss. However, I'm scared to look at Melanie's as she writes SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO many posts, I bet there is like 568 to look at! LMAO She is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much better at keeping up than me!!!!!!!!!!
A big sorry to Jen too as because she went private a little while ago (which I totally understand) she doesn't show up in my google reader anymore. I should make sure I go over to her blog as soon as I've finished looking at the reader wotsit more often!
And my best blogging buddie of all SYD! I love ya, I read your blog all the time, I'm just rubbish at commenting as much as I really want to! I think I will come back to your posts and write what I wanna say once I have done Kadyns lunch, or changed her bum, or put her to bed and then before I know it a month has gone by!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anyway, gotta go pee AGAIN - guess that what drinking 4 litres of water a day does!!! Could you imagine if I was going on a long car journey! Nightmare! :o)
Wednesday, 5 March 2008
Back On It - Update
OK, it is 23:47 and I should be in bed....AGAIN ! But, as usual I am addicted to this silly computer ARGH :o(
Anyways, I did NOT drink my 4 glasses of water. I did drink 2 glasses of diet sprite (does that count?) and I did NOT eat my 2 portions of fruit and veg (oh hold up, I did have sag aloo in with my chicken korma curry so that is 1 portion and oh hold up some more as there is also potatoe in sag aloo so that is 2 - wooooooooooo hooooooooooo) .....BUT, I didn't eat any cake, biscuits or chocolate (choc milk doesn't count right?) so all in all I didn't do 2 bad LOL
Anyway....na night XXXXXXXX
Back On It - One tiny step at a time
OK, so I need to sort this diet stuff out. I need to do some exercise, I just need to get rid of some of this flabber labber!!!! So, I decided this morning that I am going to set small goals each morning and then TRY my best to stick to them. Some of you will probably think that setting myself a goal to drink 4 glasses of water today is rubbish as you are meant to drink 8 BUT seen as I can quite easily go a whole week, yes a whole week without drinking ONE glass, that would be a BRILLIANT achievement for ME.
So, little steps and then maybe I won't bodge them up and then EAT cos I've got all fed up with not doing what I said I was going to do - am I making sense?
Anyway, today's targets:
1. Drink 4 glasses of water
2. Eat 2 portions of fruit or veg (if anyone knows how to measure how much a portion is for one of the "5 a day" things pleeeeeease let me know)
3. Don't eat any cakes, biscuits or chocolate
My new bloggy friend Melanie is also trying to diet - check her page out too.
As for my exercise dilemma - do I join a gym (scared that I will pay that monthly fee, go for 3 months and then not bother going and still be paying THAT monthly fee for the rest of the year....AGAIN) OR, do I get the MY GYM from under the bed and actually USE it.....OR, do I get the keep fit dvd out and jump up and down in my lounge.....OR, do I stick Loola in her pushchair and walk to the shops (danger as shops have food) ????????????????? What to do, What to do??????????????? Argh!
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